what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
