Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
how drunk are you?
Several
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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