It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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