am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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