Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
