Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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