let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Randomize
