people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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