so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
