Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
