we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
