i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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