I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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