butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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