I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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