She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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