I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
