Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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