I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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