The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
