someone get that fucking seahorse.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Randomize
