Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
