i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
