We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
