we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize