When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
