I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
We smell like vodka and hangover
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
