you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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