If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Randomize
