So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
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