i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
