Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
