"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
