We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
my poor anus
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
