Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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