i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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