i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
