i may or may not be watching the land before time
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
