Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
