We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I skipped work to stalk him.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
