He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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