I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
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