dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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