ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
