I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
