I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
