At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
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