That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
