Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
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