just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Randomize
